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| Mark and Carol Nehrbas at the Grotto of Lourdes THE VICTORY OF THE CROSS OVER SUFFERING AND CANCER: 2019 DIOCESAN MEN’S DAY OF RENEWAL HIGHLIGHTS
At the 2019 Men’s
Conference, Mark Nehrbas shared the spiritual insights into suffering that he discovered
in his six year battle with stomach cancer.
This topic is so important because every one of us, sooner or later,
will have to suffer. It is the lot of
man after the fall of Adam and Eve, our first parents. As my deceased father, Dr. John J. S.
Sebastian often noted: “Every man has his cross to bear”. And how we bear it can bring us salvation and
make us saints. We must realize that God
in his infinite wisdom and love for us allows suffering for a reason.
“Victory of the Cross in My Battle With Cancer” was the title of his
morning talk, a personal testimony. Nehrbas
began by quoting the words of our savior: "Whoever believes in me does not
believe in me only, but in the one who sent me” (John 12:44). Jesus is alive today because of the
Resurrection. The kingdom of God is
ours…….our inheritance. Christ had to
suffer and so do we. Suffering is part
of the life of any apostle…….one who is sent on a mission. Indeed God has a special mission for each one
of us.
It was the Year of
Faith (2012-13). His doctor sent him to
the hospital for a scan of his stomach with a scope. Mark said the prayer of abandonment to the
will of God. They found a tumor, an
uncommon Stage 2 Stomach Cancer. This
marked the beginning of a six year journey with the anxiety, the fear, the
pain, and the frustration over two separate bouts with an aggressive form of
stomach cancer…..two major surgeries, countless days with painful chemo,
repeated doses of radiation. In the first
bout they had to remove his entire stomach. Naturally Mark Nehrbas was afraid of facing
death. He wanted to live to see his
grandchildren grow up. After treatment
and surgery, the cancer was in remission.
Through all of this, Mark’s prayer life became more intense; his faith
and trust in God deepened.
Christ healed the paralytic by means of
the faith of those praying for him. God’s
blessing will be in proportion to your confidence in Him. There is power in intercessory prayer. Your prayers can change lives; your prayers
are powerful. But God wants us to trust
Him.
In August 2017 Mark’s cancer came back and
his second
bout began. Thus they had to
remove his appendix, gall bladder, and remove cancer from his spleen. Providentially and unexpectantly, a generous
friend, a member of the Knights of Malta, intervened. The knights offered to sponsor Mark Nehrbas
to make a pilgrimage to the great Marian shrine of Lourdes in southwestern
France. After the Shrine of Our Lady of
Guadalupe in Mexico City, Lourdes is the most popular in the world, receiving 6
million pilgrims per year. Before the
pilgrimage Mark’s tumor marker was 370 which is very high, but was unaware of
that ominous result at the time. Dr.
Mushim informed his patient that the cancer returned. Mark would have to resume cancer treatment after
his return.
Nehrbas bathed in the healing waters of
Lourdes like the hundreds of others with serious illnesses every day. Since Mark was asked by a number of people to
pray for them, he forgot to pray for himself.
However, other people prayed for him.
During his first medical appointment after his return, Dr. Mushim was
baffled. Mark’s tumor count was 25 which
is very normal and there was no trace of cancer! Mark knew that his healing was a miracle.
Mark Nehrbas’ spiritual journey actually
began many years before. In 1971 the new
high school graduate was confused and without purpose. At the University of Dayton he went through
three different majors in three months, was hooked on drugs, and did not know
what he wanted. After graduating from
college, Mark traveled to find himself and stopped attending Mass.
A friend witnessed to him about the 4th
Spiritual Law. God loves you and has a
purpose for you. God suffered for
you. “For all have sinned and fall short
of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). We
must accept Jesus Christ as our personal Lord and Savior. Christ is the light that illuminated his
outlook.
Healing
Service. After this first
talk, Mark Nehrbas held a brief healing service. And sprinkled the holy water of Lourdes over
all of the men present. Mark made it
clear that God heals some and not others.
“Victory
Over Suffering: Lessons Learned From the Cross”. In his afternoon talk Mark Nehrbas pointed
out that from the perspective of eternity (that’s all what really matters),
suffering is a gift. God does not cause
suffering, but He does permit it (His permissive will) for a reason. God loves each one of us so much and is very
compassionate. He is with you. Nehrbas emphasized: “We have the cross with
the corpus to show that Christ suffered too so that we may enter Heaven and
save us from eternal suffering after death”.
Mark Nehrbas has nine children and not all
of them are faithful Catholics today. A
couple left the Church……something that breaks the heart of any faithful father
and mother. He observed that all
suffering is a consequence of sin. Mark
referred to the apostolic letter of St. John
Paul II: “Salvifici Doloris: On the Christian Meaning of Human Suffering”
(for the original complete text, click on http://www.vatican.va/content/john-paul-ii/en/apost_letters/1984/documents/hf_jp-ii_apl_11021984_salvifici-doloris.html). The saintly Pope acknowledged not only
physical suffering, but also moral and spiritual suffering.
Nehrbas then referred to 1 Peter 4:1-5, showing that
we all suffer in the flesh as Christ did.
We should have the same attitude as Jesus did…….live your life not on
human desires, but on the will of God. He
quoted St. Rose of Lima: “Apart from the cross there is no other ladder by
which we may get to heaven.” God will
not allow us to have more suffering than we can handle or bear. He will give us the grace we need.
Mark got through his big cross by first having to bear
little crosses as preparation. “The
cross gives us a special closeness to Christ”.
He reminded us to imitate Jesus as a model in His Agony in the Garden of
Gethsemane: “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet, not
as I will, but as you will” (Matthew 26:39 and 1Peter 2:21). Nehrbas testified: “Suffering has helped me in my quest for
holiness”. Suffering, which will come to
everyone of us sooner or later, can make us holy if handled in the right way…….being
resigned to God’s will and offering it all up to Him.
Simeon prophesized to Mary that a sword would pierce
her heart (Luke 2:25-35). Indeed Mary
had seven great sorrows (see https://blog.franciscanmedia.org/sam/the-seven-sorrows-of-mary
and/or https://www.ncregister.com/blog/mfenelon/what-are-the-seven-sorrows-of-mary?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIp-Tiotz-5wIVDvDACh1mfgHpEAAYAyAAEgImh_D_BwE
). Any parent, who has had to undergo
the grief of losing a child, can identify with Mary.
We can even have joy in our suffering if we can see
purpose in it, as St. Paul did in Romans 5:3 and Colossians 1:24). Christ calls us into a deeper relationship
with Him. One way is through
suffering. Then the fruits of the spirit
will grow in us. Eventually, our
suffering will cease…..that is in Heaven.
Mark enumerated the eight lessons he learned from the
cross (see the appendix of (133) Lourdes, the Mystery of the Value of
Suffering, Healing, and the World Day of the Sick http://paulrsebastianphd.blogspot.com/2014/02/133-lourdes-and-world-day-of-sick.html
or (181) The Gift of Suffering: Lessons Learned from the Cross at http://diosteubmen.blogspot.com. Mark Nehrbas asked the men to look at things
from an eternal perspective. We will
live forever; the question is where?
Suffering with Christ can change the world. Suffering makes us more compassionate and
creates a bond among people. Offering up
his stomach surgery as a sacrificial prayer brought his son back to the
Church. Don’t waste your suffering. Make a prayer out of it and offer it up to
the Lord.
Other Events of the Day
The day
opened with a Holy Hour followed by the first talk by Mark Nehrbas. In the Communal Penance Service Fr. Tim
Shannon noted that “the devil made the sin seem attractive”. We should have the attitude: “God, I want to
be what you want me to be”. “We must
turn away from disobedience and unfaithfulness”.
Bishop Jeffrey Monforton
The
lunch made for some great fellowship and a break. After Mark Nehrbas’ second talk, the day ended with
the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass celebrated by Bishop Jeffrey Monforton, who also
was the homilist.
Homily By Bishop Jeffrey Monforton. As Chairman of the United
States Conference of Catholic Bishops Subcommittee on Aid to the Church in
Central and Eastern Europe, the Bishop shared a little about the Church in
these formerly Communist countries. The
Ukraine is war torn as ethnic Russians with the help of Russia is trying to
break away. In the Ukraine there is a
mixture of Roman Catholics, Greek Catholics, and Orthodox with some
Muslims. Under the dictator, Joseph
Stalin 6 million Ukrainians starved to death.
His homily centered on
the Gospel parable of the Prodigal Son.
The father loved both of his sons and was faithful to both of them. Mercy and compassion ruled his heart. Similarly God has a great fatherly love for
each one of us. We should try to see people
with the mercy and compassion of God. True
compassion and care require our initiative.
We should be merciful on others since our Father in Heaven is merciful.
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